Monday, August 4, 2014

Out Of The Blue

I got to spend the weekend with my daughter (Liz), my son (Tom) and his wife (Laura), and my best friend Linda (best buds for 31 years!).  It was our annual scrapping weekend and this year my son joined us! 

On Saturday we made a large work area in the dining room and each claimed a spot to work on our project:  Liz & I - greeting cards, Linda - scrapbook pages, Tom and Laura - school projects (they are teachers).  We played games Saturday night and laughed nonstop for 4 hours.  We were laughing so hard we were crying and our ribs hurt by the time we went to bed. Sunday we went to church and had lunch together before everyone left for home about 1:00.  

It was a wonderful weekend.  I loved the chance to spend time with my kids and my best friend.  There were more blessings in those two days spent together than I could even begin to write about. 

So imagine my surprise when I found myself feeling blue on Sunday after everyone was gone.  Michael was out taking pictures so it was just me and our two dogs.  They were exhausted from all the activity and were curled up on the sectional on their blankets... fast asleep.  

I really couldn't put my finger on why I was feeling melancholy.  I never like feeling down, but it really drives me nuts when I don't know the cause. It's like trying to nail Jell-O to the wall.  As hard as I might try to think of a reason for this sudden case of the blues, the reason seemed to be elusive. 

Maybe it was the mild headache I had.

Maybe it was because I was tired.  

Maybe the house just seemed too quiet after having all the activity for 48 hours.  

Maybe it's because my chai level was low.

Maybe it's because having my kids here reminded me of when they were young and I was feeling the passage of time that I typically embrace with grace.  

Maybe it's because I'm in midlife.

Maybe it's because I was just due for a good cry. 

Maybe it's because the weekend had come and gone so quickly.

Maybe it's because even though I often tell the kids I love them, sometimes I wonder if they really know how much.

Maybe it's because I missed my husband. 

Maybe it's because in the presence of my kids I felt even more the absence of my own parents.  


Maybe it's everything.


Maybe it's nothing.


 I usually don't write blog posts like this as I try to keep things encouraging, uplifting, and humorous.  

But sometimes the best I can do is say, "Life is not perfect, I have those moments too."

Sometimes being real is the best thing I have to offer you.  

That and a hug.

1 comment:

  1. Each of your feelings I share after being blessed to have spent time with my children. I tell myself that it is "normal," and now I have your blog to reinforce my theory. Thanks, Barb.

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