Doggy Dementia (CCD)

It has been a longgg time since I put anything on my blog, but felt this was the appropriate place to post this information.

We recently shared on social media that our 13-year-old basset, Willow, has CCD (Canine Cognitive Disorder), otherwise known as doggy dementia.  Due to the number of people who have commented and messaged, so many others are experiencing similar issues and we felt it was important to share our journey so far.  First, a little background into how this began.  

Our first sign that something was wrong was late last summer when Willow would occasionally stare into a corner for seemingly no reason. She then started getting up between 4:00 and 5:00 in the morning.  We would let her outside to go to the bathroom and attempt to go back to bed.  Once back in bed she would be restless and within 30 minutes wanted to be up again.  We assumed this was an attempt to try to move breakfast time up as Willow loves mealtime!  Willow has lost her hearing so I didn't feel I was able to effectively communicate to her that we needed more sleep.  We reached out to an animal communicator, thinking it was a behavioral issue, and that by working through her we could relay to Willow that after going outside we needed to go back to bed and sleep more.  Starting my day at 4 a.m. was taking its toll on me and I was ready for a quick fix!  

In our animal communication session (done by phone), she relayed that she was getting that Willow might have dog dementia. That was not what we expected to hear!  Following that session we contacted our veterinarian, Dr. Liz McClure in Boone, who assessed Willow and agreed that her symptoms were consistent with early-stage dog dementia. 

Please note that while I am typing this as it relates to dogs, cats can have dementia too. These are some of the signs and symptoms of dog dementia and I noted what we have experienced so far:  

- staring into a corner (Willow's first noticed symptom last summer)

- acting confused (daily for Willow, but very off and on)

- spatial confusion (Willow doesn't always realize the space she takes up and how it relates to us moving around her)

- seeming uninterested in food (Willow eats well at times, other times hardly eats)

- looking for you (yesterday Willow went to the door looking for me - I was sitting on the sectional and when she looked at me I smiled and waved at her and she ran over to me, she just forgets where she saw us last)

- twilighting or sundowning - restlessness at night and sleeping more during the day (definitely experienced this as above)

 - going outside and forgetting why they are out there or going out repeatedly, forgetting they were just out  

- soiling in the home

 - forgetting who you are at times  

 - getting stuck in places they typically would be able to get out of 

 - barking for no reason at all

I know I am missing other symptoms so don't consider this a complete list.  Symptoms of CCD can mimic other health issues, so work with your veterinarian to rule out any other underlying causes.  

Dr. McClure gave us a list of things to do and I wanted to share those with you.   Just a reminder, none of these are going to reverse the dementia. The goal is to slow the progression and give your pet the best quality of life possible for as long as possible. Here are the recommendations we received:

 - Omega 3 fatty acids - they do so much for our pets in so many ways!  (Think Fish Oil.)

 - Food games and puzzles for mental stimulation

 - Walks for mental stimulation.  - slow down and let your dog sniff everything it wants!

 - Senilife - a brain supplement.  We could not find access to this locally or for wholesale.  We ordered this from a pet pharmacy.

 - Adaptil collars or diffusers - a pheromone based calming product (we brought the diffusers into our store as well as the feline version Feliway)

 - Gabapentin - a prescription to help with anxiety and pain (age related in Willow's case) 

 - Melatonin (OTC) to help with better sleep at night - ask your vet to get the correct dose

 - Selegiline - a prescription to reduce stress.  This is the generic of Anipryl. We got this through our regular human pharmacy.  While that would be my preference (always support local as much as possible) we will likely need to order this from the pet pharmacy going forward.  One month was $107 through our pharmacy and through the pet pharmacy it will cut the cost in half it appears.  Again, the above modalities will not reverse dementia, but hopefully slow the progression.

In the last 6-9 months Willow has lost her hearing.  In researching as much as I could about CCD it was interesting to read that pets who lose their hearing can be more prone to CCD.  Is it because they are processing less by not hearing?  We use a lot of hand signals with Willow.  Because of her hearing loss, if she wakes up and we aren't in the room OR if we get up for any reason, she follows.  She wants to know where we are all the time, not knowing makes her very anxious.  

Our goal as a business is to help our customers' pets live longer, healthier lives. Our goal as Willow's people, is to do the same for her.  In my opinion, as we continue to do better for our pets nutritionally and see them living longer, we will likely see more cases of CCD.  By making Omega 3 fatty acids a regular part of your pet's diet, mentally stimulating them with walks and enrichment toys throughout their life, we can hopefully delay dementia in more pets going forward.

As always, when you know better you can do better. 

25 Things

Most of you who read my blog know me, some better than others.  I came across a fun blog post idea that involves sharing things some of you  may not know about me.  I decided why not!  So here goes.  I'm not sure if this is liberating or scary.  We'll decide together....

1.  How It All Began:  I was born a month premature, in the car, on the way to the  hospital.  That could be a blog post all its own!

2.  What Scares Me Most:  Snakes... and the current state of our country.  But mostly snakes.

3.  My Favorite Meal:  Pizza (pepperoni, green pepper, and onion please)!  Buffalo chicken is my second favorite meal.

4.  My Favorite Drink:  Vanilla Chai.  (I'm guessing you knew that one).

5.  My Favorite Dessert:  Ice Cream.

6.  My Favorite Anytime-Of-Day Treat:  Chocolate.  I think ice cream and chocolate have become their own food groups in midlife.

7.  My Go-To Saying:  "Heavens To Betsy!"  (My stepson  pointed  this out.)

8.  Favorite Hobbies:  Making greeting cards, reading,  and naps. I've also learned doing absolutely nothing is kind of fun too.

9.  What I've Learned From My Husband:  Slow down and enjoy life.

10.  What I've Learned From My Kids:  Time flies but love is constant.

11.  What I've Learned From My Grandkids:  Imaginary money is fun, hugs are the best.  "I love you" never sounded so awesome.

12.  What I've Learned From My Dogs:  Real love is unconditional.

13.  Someone I  Have  Always Been Intrigued By:  Lizzie Borden.

14.  My Favorite Author:  Stephen King. 

(It may not have been a good idea to put those two back to back. I AM normal.)

15.  The Household Chore I Dislike Most:  Emptying the dishwasher.

16.  I Love:  Grocery Shopping (okay, pretty much any shopping - except for shoes and jeans! Oh, and hardware stores... too  many tools.)

17.  One Of My Strengths Is:  Making sure my job is done well.

18.  A Weakness:  Sometimes being too nice is a weakness.  (I almost felt like I was in a job interview with those two questions - and honestly they were the most difficult to answer.)

19.  Favorite Music:  Contemporary Christian - Michael W. Smith, Mercy Me, Tenth Avenue North, etc.

20.  A Highlight For Me:  Acting as security person for Mark Schultz when he was in concert.  It was pretty neat.  I'm not sure how good I would have been  had the job involved any real security issues though!

21.  A Lowlight For Me:  Not being true to myself.

22.  Most Used Accessory:  My Fitbit.  It is a great watch.  I need to utilize its other functions on a more consistent basis.  

23.  I  Regret:  Not being my daughter's maid-of-honor when she asked.

24.  My Favorite Day:  A rainy one where I can just snuggle up with Willow and read a book.

25.  I Miss:  Getting snowstorms that actually brought everything to a standstill.

Snapshot

I Am Currently....

Reading:  An Unseen Angel,  by Alissa Parker.  It is her story of life after losing her daughter, Emilie, in the Sandy Hook shooting in Newtown, Connecticut.  Before that I read The First Phone Call From Heaven by Mitch Albom.  Both are must reads!

Checking:  Things off my to-do list today. 

Kitchen cleaned. 

I went to the store and steam cleaned the office floor. 

Willow and I went for a short walk.

Laundry is done. 

Dusting is done.

Celebrating:  Mother's Day with a new garage door opener.  It's not your traditional gift, but we thought it would be awesome to be able to get the cars in and out of the garage when needed.  After 13 years it joined the microwave in bidding adieu.

This joins our nontraditional Easter a few years ago when we got a new dryer.

Hearing:  Commercials that tell us we can  have that beach body by summer.  I definitely need to make better food choices, but I pray we all are reminded constantly that we are beautiful just as we are - flaws included.  We could chase perfection forever and still not be happy with the way we are.  Life is too short for that.

Smelling:  Pizza.  Life is good!

Working:  On orders for the store.  We are expanding several areas and I can't wait for the work to be done and new products to be received and out!  Just when we think we have the store where we want it, we come up with other ideas on how to make use of every bit of space. 

Wondering: How to spend $1000.  One of our grandsons, Mason, (now 6), gave me a card for Mother's Day and the back is worth $1000.  He kept asking how I was going to spend it.  I told him we do need a new microwave.  Now just to convince the appliance store to accept that method of payment. 

Feeling: Blessed to have had phone calls, dinner, and visits with all of our kids.  I couldn't ask for a better Mother's Day than to simply be loved.

Delighting In The Dust

It's my Friday night as I am off tomorrow.  My to-do list for Friday is long as I haven't done much housework for a good week.  Okay, maybe two weeks.  There have been other things I have needed to do, like absolutely nothing... or taking a nap... or making cards... or talking to Willow....or grocery shopping    (I truly LOVE grocery shopping). So I've put housework on the back burner.  The only things that have been done have been the necessities:  doing laundry, reloading and emptying the dishwasher (and repeat), etc. 

Honestly, I would prefer to grab a book and get lost in it for the whole day, but real life calls.  Due to lack of energy and interest it is now time to dig in and get things done.  My housework list includes:

Dusting - I may write my name in the dust first.  It's kind of hard to resist doing that sometimes.

Vacuuming - Seriously, I love seeing how much hair/fur/dirt I get up.  I don't know whether to be proud of that or embarrassed.

Decluttering - Picking things up a second or third time because we didn't put them away the first time. 

More laundry - It never ends. I'm aiming high tomorrow to even include folding and putting away!

Making the bed - At least once a week I like to try to accomplish  this. No overachieving here.

Balancing checkbooks - A daily task.

Paying bills   - See above.

Cleaning bathrooms - Ugh says it all.

Sweeping & Mopping - aka chasing dust bunnies with the broom and then finding some that succeeded in fleeing when I scrub the floors.

...and this is only a smidgen of what needs to be done inside. 

We won't even talk about outdoor work.

*******

But I'm blessed to have furniture to collect precious photos, books, memories.... and dust.

Our carpet may be 12 years old, but it keeps our tootsies warm in the winter and gives us a soft spot to put our feet in the morning.

Clutter means we've accomplished something during the day.

Dirty laundry means we are fortunate to have plenty of clothes to wear.

We are blessed to be able to sleep at night in a nice cozy bed. Don't you love crawling in bed after a long day and feeling like it is just heaven?

Checkbooks record the ebb and flow of money and we are always reminded that no matter what the balances are, we are blessed.

I'll gladly clean the bathrooms in lieu of using an outhouse.

Scrubbing floors is a great reminder that all stains and spots can be wiped away and a clean slate given no matter what life has thrown your way.

Yes, cleaning is mundane and we have all muttered about having to do it at times.

But having housework to do means we have a place to call home. There is no better feeling in the world than loving your home, not because of its value or size, but because of those you share it with.

While my to-do list is full, so is my heart.

Foodie Friday (A Day Early) : My Vanilla Chai

I have sat down numerous times in the last 4-5 months to write about things I was passionate about, but after sitting at the computer and writing I would decide not to post after all. I just didn't feel it.  I knew at some point there would be a subject I was both passionate about and "felt it.".... and here we are!

Yes, I am seriously passionate about my chai.

I blame thank my stepdaughter.  Twelve years ago when her dad and I were engaged a wedding shower was given for us and one of the gifts she gave me was Tastefully Simple Oh My! Chai.  I wasn't new to this product.  I had it in the past and it was okay, but when I tried it again after our shower I was hooked (to say the least).  Since she was a consultant for the company I felt the least I could do was buy more and support her business. :)

A few years later the company discontinued the chai.  I tried numerous other vanilla chai versions on the market:  powders, refrigerated drinks, unrefrigerated drinks.... but they were either too spicy or too watery. It was like Goldilocks and the Three Bears;  they just were not right. 

Then I finally found one at a warehouse store and Michael  encouraged me to try it.  I was sure I was going to be disappointed and it would be a waste of money as it was each time I tried a new chai, but I reluctantly picked up a can.  To my surprise I LOVED it!  That became my trusted go-to chai the last few years.

Michael says I am addicted.  I tell him "addicted" is a pretty strong word. Over the years I have come to grips with the idea this could be true.  Are there healthier things I could be drinking?  Absolutely.  Are there worse things I could be drinking?  Definitely. I guess if chai is my worst vice I'll take that. 

We won't talk about how much chai I drink.  Let's just say morning, mid-morning, noon, mid-afternoon, night, middle of the night... there's no wrong time for chai.  

So when I ordered more chai a couple of  months ago, the same old routine, I expected the same old result.  However, upon opening the can it didn't smell like it usually did and I knew the recipe wasn't "right".  After making a cup and taking one sip it confirmed that I had received what I felt was a "bad batch."  I tried stirring it up to make sure the ingredients were fully blended and making a second... and third cup, only to get the same result. Blech!  You know that feeling when you are so anticipating something and it ends up not at all what you expected? 

Well not only was I disappointed (and chai-less), but  my husband got worried. Honestly he was starting to panic at the thought of me without chai.  He kept saying, "What are you going to do?"  He definitely was concerned, although I am not sure if he was more concerned for me or himself. 

He says I am "crabitable" when I don't have my chai.  I have no  clue what he is talking about!  First of all, that isn't even a word... and secondly I say HE is crabitable when I don't have chai! 

I contacted the company about my bad batch.  After looking at my order history they realized I was really serious about this stuff and they offered to send me some from  a different lot and asked me to let them know how it tasted.  Yep, I was that good of a customer.

So like a kid at Christmas I waited for that chai to arrive.  When the FedEx guy brought it I told him I had been waiting for him all day.  To say I was giddy would be an understatement.  However, all I had to do was open the can and smell it and I knew it was not going to be good.  I made some and yes, the second batch they sent also tasted "off",  although not as bad.  I contacted the company with the results and they are going to get back to me  with  the  analysis of the lots in question and will  let me  know if they hear of issues from other customers. 

In the meantime life goes on and this woman needs chai!

At this point you have to be agreeing with my husband and thinking "addicted" may be too subtle of a word.  I can live with that.

So  with  no idea of when "the good stuff" would be available again  I decided it was time to start making my own chai and not rely on others to supply me with it.  Yes, I know how that sounds. I had attempted making my own a few years ago before I had my food processor and it just didn't  work out well.  I realized I now had the right kitchen appliance and there was definitely a need as we were in full crisis mode here!

I searched online for vanilla chai recipes and found one that matched the ingredients in the one I had been drinking and headed to the store.  I compared the recipes to determine what ingredient should be first, second, etc., in order to come up with a recipe that came closest to the recipe I loved.  I have made several batches and tweaked the recipe each time.  I loved the last batch I made and felt it was worthy of sharing.

If you love a subtle, creamy, vanilla chai like I do, try this recipe I came  up with.

My Vanilla Chai

3-3/4 cups sugar

3-1/2 cups dry milk

1 cup french vanilla creamer

1-1/2 cup regular creamer

1-1/4 cup unsweetened tea

2-1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/4 tsp ginger

1/4 tsp cloves

1/8 tsp cardamom

I have a 13-cup food processor and blend the sugar and milk first.  Once those are blended and reduced to a fine powder I add the creamers and tea and blend again.  Last, add the spices and blend.  I hand stir at the end as well to make sure ingredients are well blended.

Put 3 T. of mix in a 10-12 oz mug and add hot water.  Stir and enjoy.

This recipe can easily be fine-tuned to your taste.  If you like a sweeter chai add a bit more sugar (go in 1/4-cup increments as it doesn't  take much to add sweetness).  If you prefer more vanilla flavor switch the amounts of the creamers around.  Prefer more spices?  Increase the spices. Also, use more mix per cup if that is your preference.

I have not measured how many cups of chai mix I get from a batch, but would guess it to be about 8 cups. 

I haven't figured out the nutritional information on this either.

Sometimes ignorance is bliss.

So is chai.

Upside Down Day

It has been 11 months since I last wrote.  That's right, 11 months!  We have flipped the calendar 11 times; gone from winter to spring to fall and back to winter again (at least close enough  to count as it snowed here the other day).  So that would explain why I couldn't recall my user name or password to my blogger account.  It was a struggle to get back into blogger,and I can't lie - there was some muttering - but I made it! 

Today is my day off and I have so been looking forward to this day.  It is probably akin to how many of you feel at 5:00 on Friday.  Don't get me wrong, I love our store and will be ready to go back to work tomorrow morning, but having a day with no commitments or time lines is ah-maz-ing!

When Michael asked what I was going to do today, I said, "Absolutely nothing!"  That was my plan.  My plan was to sit in pajamas covered with a blanket with Willow curled up next to me and zone out - maybe read a book or work on a puzzle at the most. 

Then I woke up motivated.  Don't you hate when that happens?! 

I have no  clue how it happened. Motivation usually doesn't find me on days off.  As a result, here's how my "absolutely nothing" looked by noon:

Double batch of Party Mix made

Dishwasher emptied, dishes put away, reloaded, and run again.
(Sad, but true. And I rarely even cook!)

Laundry for the store done

Sheets washed

Dining room table rediscovered

Willow had a Spa Day (nail trim and ears cleaned)

I placed several orders for the store

I paid some bills...

And I'm not done yet.  

I still need to:

Count donation money

Do a LOT of shredding

File business paperwork

Rearrange the guest room

Make scalloped potatoes & ham for supper

and I'd like to start working on a puzzle

I know when he gets home tonight Michael will say, "I thought you wanted a day of doing nothing!"  But it's really not about doing absolutely nothing.  It's about doing things at my pace, with no time commitments. Those days are few and far between.

It's turning the television off and picking my favorite music to listen to. 

It's relaxing with my feet up while I write, with the glow of the Christmas lights on the tree (and Willow) to keep me company.  Let me clarify that, the Christmas lights are on the tree, not on Willow! I could go back  and reword that,  but it's kind of a fun twist. 

Sometimes it is the littlest things that help us find calm, peace, and focus. For me it is music and the lights on the tree. And of course, being able to do all the above in pajamas helps. I may not have written for a while, but I haven't changed much! 

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and pray we all carry that feeling of being grateful and blessed into the holiday season.

I need to get back to my list of absolutely nothing.

Talk to you soon!

Crockpot Beef & Noodles

Cold weather means comfort food in our house!  I thought this sounded perfect for this cold day and we were not disappointed.  It's quick and easy to make and was just the thing to warm us up at the end of the day. 

 

 

 

 

Crockpot Beef & Noodles

 

1-2 pounds stew meat (may use beef tips, or roast cut into bite-sized pieces)

4 cups of water

1 can cream of mushroom soup

1 can cream of chicken soup

2 packets brown gravy mix

12 oz. frozen egg noodles

Sliced mushrooms (optional)

 

Place liner in crockpot or grease to make cleanup easier.  Put meat in crockpot.  Combine the water, canned soups, and dry gravy mix in a bowl.  Whisk to blend well.  Pour over the beef and cook on low for 6-8 hours. 

 

About 45-60 minutes before eating turn the crockpot to high and add the frozen egg noodles - pushing them into the liquid to make sure they are submerged. 

 

We had this with a side of frozen sweet corn and it was a wonderful hearty meal that helped take the chill off a cold day. 

Suck It Up, Buttercup!

It's hard to believe that 11 months ago today we opened our business.  We knew our venture would take a lot of time, energy, money, and faith .....and it has, but we wouldn't change a thing! 

 

Because so much has been focused on the business-side of life, I have been neglecting my health, in particular... a healthy diet. With longer work days we often found ourselves at the end of the day saying, "What are we going to have for supper?"  More often than not that turned into a trip through a drive-thru on the way home - or pizza delivery if you asked Michael. 

 

In the last 2 months we were each working 70+ hours a week and that is when my food choices got even worse (if that is possible) , with my evening meal consisting of whatever was on hand to grab:  chips, a shake, or nothing - preferring sleeping to eating.  Michael started counting calories and losing weight in November and I was so proud of him, but I was not on the same page at that point. My goal was to simply get through the holiday season with this routine: eat junk, work, eat more junk, crash... repeat. 

 

(Sounds like a recipe for success, right?!)

 

The great news is we survived our first holiday season with just the two of us working!  We were blessed with a lot of customers and that kept us encouraged and invigorated.  Okay, invigorated may be too strong of a word, but it kept us encouraged enough to get up and open the store each day! Now that the holidays are over the only hurdle we have remaining is inventory, then we will be back to our regular schedule and we will each go back to having some time off away from the store to get recharged.

 

(Big sigh.)

 

We had our last Christmas gathering on Sunday.  By the end of the day I had broken my little toe on my right foot.  I blame my maternal lineage for the unique toes and how easy it is to catch them on things and break them.  I could wear shoes around the house, but that would be too easy.  Apparently I'd rather break a toe and then whine about it.  I knew I needed to make a visit to my doctor for a dehydration issue.  As I got ready for bed I spotted my reflection (sideways) in the mirror... and groaned.  I knew I had been eating poorly and gaining weight, but I could easily be fooled by a near-sighted frontal view....however, even poor eyesight couldn't hide the change I saw in the side view.

 

(Big groan.) 

 

I ran to the freezer (well, walked as fast as I could with a broken toe) and threw away all the leftover Christmas goodies.  I went through the pantry and threw out anything that resembled junk food.  Lastly, I messaged my doctor to see if she had any openings the next day.  Some days you just need a "come to Jesus meeting."  I had a couple of things I had put on hold seeing her about, and knew it was time to take care of me again.

 

The next morning I weighed (it put the "ugh" in "ugly"). I saw numbers on the scale that I vowed I would never see again following my LapBand surgery and I knew it was time to nip it in the bud before things got worse.  I had breakfast and went old school, counting calories.   (If you're wondering how I could be gaining weight with a LapBand - the band does nothing for sugar-based foods - they slide through with the greatest of ease.)

 

Fortunately at my appointment my blood pressure was wonderful.  I was thankful my weight gain had not caused it to rise.  I had some lab work done to confirm that I was simply dehydrated - no infection, and I told my doctor about getting back on track and eating healthy again. 

 

(I didn't mention my toe, I'm too used to breaking it and living with it. My sister will understand this.) 

 

So with my appointment behind me and nothing but resolve in front of me I headed to the grocery store and stocked up on fruits, veggies, and lots of great protein options for the crockpot.  By the time I got home I had a headache, felt nauseous, and was tired.  It continued into the night and made for a poor night's sleep.  I didn't think much of it, but when it was still there the next day I googled "sugar withdrawal symptoms."

 

Bingo.

 

 

This stuff that I had fallen increasingly in love with in the last 11 months had turned against me.

 

A decade ago, it was estimated that the average American consumed  22 teaspoons of added sugar per day, amounting to an extra 350 calories. A few months ago, one expert suggested that the average person consumes 238 teaspoons of sugar each week.

 

I'm pretty sure I was overachieving on a GINORMOUS scale (the word "ginormous" drives Michael crazy so I had to use it!) when it came to sugar consumption. 

 

So I'm on Day 4 of a nagging headache, nausea, fatigue, irritability and brain fog.  Michael would say brain fog is a normal for me and I agree, but I think it is definitely exacerbated by the decrease in sugar.  I've started eating healthier more times in my life than I can count and I have never felt like this, so that tells you how bad my diet had become.  Never has eating so good felt so miserable.

 

I'm not out to omit sugar altogether, I'm just decreasing it.  I found 2 bowls of Christmas goodies in the fridge this morning that I had forgotten were there, and yes,  I had 2 cookies.  Then my broken toe and I took those bowls to the garbage and dumped them as fast as we could before anymore were consumed. 

 

There are so many possible New Year's Resolutions out there:  lose weight, improve health, eat right, exercise, but I'm just focusing on eating better.  I know the others will follow. I have a physical in late January so am hoping to see good results at that time.

 

I have a chicken cooking in the crockpot and green beans will also be on the menu for dinner.  I do find that the further out I get the more I crave protein, fruits, and veggies, rather than the sweet and salty things.  

 

I know the physical symptoms will improve. Some people have symptoms for several weeks.  I've been telling God I know it is my own fault, but if He could relieve me of these symptoms sooner than that I would be really, really grateful.  However long they last, I know they are of my own doing so I just keep telling myself:

 

"Suck it up Buttercup!" 

Wishing you all a Happy, Healthy New Year!

For Noah

It is hard to believe that  nine years have passed since Michael and I were married.  Sometimes it seems like just yesterday and at other times it seems he has always been a part of my life.  The day we were married was such a special day.  I thought you might like to see our favorite photo from our wedding.

 

 

In the years between then and now our family has grown.  Between us we have 2 daughters, 2 sons, 2 daughters-in-law, 2 sons-in-law, and 7 grandchildren.  We are very blessed to have such a wonderful family.

 

A couple of years ago I blogged about my wedding dress.  It had been cleaned, was "museum preserved" and displayed in a box...in a closet.  I didn't know what to do with it - it was a part of a very special day yet really seemed to have no purpose beyond that.

 

 

 

 

Then came Noah.

 

Noah Thomas was our 8th grandchild.  He was born on November 2, 2014,  at 20 weeks, and passed away shortly after his birth.  As a parent I can't even begin to imagine what it is like to lose your child.  But I can tell you what it is like to see your child grieving over the loss of their child.

 

It is hard.

 

It is incredibly hard.

 

You watch them hold their baby, see their tears... and know they wonder why.

 

You hold your grandchild, give him kisses, tell him how much you love him.. and you wonder why.

 

You wonder what might have been.

 

And yes, you think, "Really God?  This is what you had planned for him?"

 

As a parent there's nothing you can do to fix your child's hurt.

 

There's no Band-Aid big enough.

 

You can't kiss the owie and make it go away like you did when they were little and skinned their knee.

 

There's nothing you can say to make sense of any of it.

 

You just pray, hug, say "I love you" and "I'm sorry."

 

Over and over.

 

And over.

 

***************************

 

 

It was 11 months ago today when that little angel entered our lives. He may have lived only briefly, but he will always be part of our family.  I still wonder why he had to leave so soon, but I have to trust God.
 

Because of Noah, I knew why I had held onto my wedding dress and its purpose.

 

Today I opened the sealed box, removed all the tissue paper and cardboard that was used to display it so nicely, and laid my wedding dress out on a bed.  One of my favorite things about my wedding dress was the beading, especially the flowers:  they resemble daisies, my favorite flower.

 

 

 

I took scissors and cut out some of the beaded flowers from the sleeves.  Perhaps one day when our granddaughters get married they will want to tuck a beaded flower from our special day into their bouquet as they walk down the aisle.  I cut out enough for our granddaughters and future granddaughters.

 

I cut out a piece for myself.  There are some wonderful artists who take a piece of your wedding dress and create pendants - something I would like to have done.

 

Then I attached my name to the label of the dress, rolled it up sleeping bag style, with the veil inside, and put it in a plastic bag.  It is now boxed up and ready to go in the mail to a wonderful organization:  Angel Gowns.

 

They will take my wedding dress and make burial attire for babies like Noah.  So many parents who lose a baby struggle to find something small enough for their wee one, or even something appropriate. This organization fills that need and provides the attire free of charge.

 

Each item of clothing made from my dress will have a note attached to it.  Not only will that note let another couple know that their grief is shared, but it is one way I can honor Noah.

 

The note attached to each article of clothing will simply read:

 

"In memory of our grandson, Noah - an angel too soon."

 

 

 

 *******************

 

Noah:  I don't know if God allows blogs in Heaven, but I'm pretty sure you know what goes on here with all of us.  Please keep Great-Grandpa F. in line.  Don't fall for his "quarter trick." I'm sure you discovered Great-Grandma has a great giggle and comfy lap.  Please take care of them for us and give them lots of hugs and kisses. We'll see you in the blink of an eye!

 

- Love Grandma M.

A Fall Top Ten

The Top 10 Reasons I Love Fall

 

 

 

10.   The cool, crisp air.

 

 

 

 

9.     Apple pie, apple crisp, applesauce, apple anything!

 

 

8.     Childhood memories of:  rake, run, jump, repeat.

 

 

7.      The crunching sound of walking on fallen leaves.

 

 

6.      Football.

 

 

5.      Self-medicating with a nonfat dark chocolate hot chocolate.

 

 

4.      Mums.

 

 

 

 

3.      Pumpkin pie, pumpkin bars.... pumpkins!

 

 

2.      Blankets and cuddling.

 

 

1.      The colors.  Always the colors.

Foodie Friday! - Chicken Enchilada Bake

Yes, it's me... and yes it is actually a Foodie Friday!  I was browsing Facebook the other morning when I was off work and spotted this recipe.  Credit goes to 12 Tomatoes for the recipe, just click here to see the original.

 

I had no idea what I was going to make for dinner that night and when I scrolled and found this recipe it looked perfect! 

 

#1 - We love Mexican food! 

#2 - I had most of the ingredients already!

But more importantly, it looked easy!

 

No, things have not changed in the Morris house.  I am still trying to find the kitchen again, and when I am there it is only briefly. 

 

So I headed to the grocery store to get the few items I needed.  After closing the store that evening Michael walked in the door, smelled dinner ready, and said, "Oh, what's for dinner!"  It tasted as good as it smelled!  This was a delicious, quick meal so I wanted to share the recipe with you. 

 

Chicken Enchilada Bake

 

19 oz. Red Enchilada Sauce

26 oz cooked canned chicken

3-4 Burrito-sized Flour Tortillas

3 cups  Mexican Blend shredded cheese

1, 4.5 ounce can of green chilies, diced

 

Spray a large round baking dish with nonstick spray.  Pour just enough of the enchilada sauce in the pan to cover the bottom, tilt pan to spread evenly.

 

Combine the chicken, 1-1/2 cups of the cheese, and the chilies in a bowl and stir to blend.

 

Next place a tortilla over the thin layer of sauce in the pan followed by 1/3 of the chicken mixture, and 1/3 of the sauce.  Repeat the tortilla, chicken, sauce layers - finishing with the last tortilla. Since I was out of sauce I covered the top tortilla with the remaining 1-1/2 cups of Mexican cheese - making sure the tortilla was completely covered.

 

Cover with foil and bake at 350 degrees for 45-55 minutes, until bubbly.  Remove from oven and let sit for 5 minutes to set.

 

I served this with some Mexican Rice on the side.

 

You could easily make this with ground beef, veggies, or all cheese.

 

Sorry I don't have any pictures - my camera lives at the store now, but trust me it is delish!

 

**********

 

I made a few changes from the original recipe.  The original recipe used a 9 x 13 pan and 2 layers (overlapping several tortillas for each tortilla layer).  I found a large baking dish to work well, I just added an extra layer.

 

Next time I would probably have a little more sauce on hand.  (I'm a sauce person, so you can never have enough in my opinion!)  The dish was plenty moist, but I would probably put sauce on the very top tortilla, before the 1-1/2 cup of cheese just because, not because it needs it. 

 

The original recipe calls for cooking chicken for the recipe - of course I take the easy way out and just use canned chicken.

 

 

Enjoy!

 

Happy Friday!